I just stumbled upon a wonderful quote:
"Time with those one loves, is life's greatest gift."
That is why my heart is broken and why life is so tragic and heartbreaking and lonely and wrong. I am missing out on life's greatest gift, the time to be with you. And it is soooo dark and desperate to know that I will never have that gift the rest of my life.
I will never see your face, hold you in my arms, talk with you, and do the nothingness of just being with you.
I am thankful for the little time we had because that was a precious gift of my lifetime. But to know I will never have that gift again is just so powerfully painful and raw and cruel.