SeaWorld digital scrapbooking pages!!

I'm way behind on my blogging!  Here are some super fun pages I made for a SeaWorld trip we took a while ago...

I just love the one of him riding the manatee in the ocean!!!  He loves it too.

He was super scared to feed the dolphins but got up the courage and loved it!

The pic of him standing by the walrus tank really turned out looking like nothing so I had some fun and added this aquarium scene!

I am so thankful for my little boy and the joy he brings me and the opportunity we have to take him fun places...

Credit: Rucola Designs

A Loss of a Good Friend

a good friend of mine died today. she was a primary nurse to both of my girls. she loved them and took such great care of them. she was really there for me - not many people are...
i feel such a loss and yet i feel kind of dumb too because i know that her family - she leaves a husband and two small children here - will suffer so much more. but tonight i am just so depressed by the thought that i have lost one of the very few people in this world that took care of and loved both of my daughters. that actually stayed in touch with me (not an easy thing...) through everything I've been through and was so supportive and understanding.
it's not a loss like the loss of my girls, but it is still such a loss to me and it is just weighing on me so much right now. my heart is so broken already that each new loss of whatever type feels like it rips it wide open again - raw and bleeding where yesterday it was only slowly leaking...
i have been going through our emails (we emailed a lot since we lived 45 min apart) and just reliving it all - which means going through the email that said simply "bree's dying" and remembering her struggles that often mirrored mine in a different way. she battled cancer (and infertility) for many, many years and finally lost that battle.
i don't have a lot of friends left. i imagine it's hard to be friends with me with all of the depression i have and sadness. and i have even fewer friends that actually knew and loved my girls personally. i could count them on a hand i think.
i think i will print all of our emails out and put them into a book to give to her family - maybe someday her little 20 month old baby girl will want to read what her mom had written and how much she longed to have her and what a good friend she was to me...
she was my scrapbooking idol, my email pen pal, an amazing nurse, and a dedicated friend. i already miss her.

Disneyland Scrapbook Page - Lilo and an Ohana Means Family digital scrapbooking freebie

This cute page of my boy and Lilo was taken at Disneyland's California Adventure during Mickey's Halloween Party.  I don't think he was that thrilled to meet her!!  But it made Mom happy anyway!
Credit: JamieDell Scraps

Here's the freebie for ya.  The Ohana means family word art.  Enjoy!  Thanks for leaving a comment if you download.

 Download here

It's Soccer Time again!

My boy's soccer season is starting up again!  I've been wanting to do some soccer pages for a long time now so I finally got them done.
I just love these cute pictures of him!
Credit: Colleen's Soccerville Kit

Disney Digital Scrapbooking Pages - CARS! and a Freebie

Some fun pages of my boy with his favorite Cars at Disneyland's California Adventure!
These pages were done for the template challenge I'm hosting this week over at MouseScrappers.com!  Head over there and check it out.

Lightning McQueen page credits: Melissa Daniel Designs
Mater page credits: Britt-ish Designs
Both pages use a template by Photocowgirl
And I have a freebie for ya!  The word art on my Mater page in a transparent background png image:

Download it here

Baby Pages for my Sister and Digital Scrapbooking Freebie

My older sister is having a baby boy!  I'm so excited for her and I wanted to do a few pages for her with his 3D ultrasound photos.  Congrats to her and her hubby Sean!

Using 40 weeks by Foxy Designs and Project B Designs

And I have a digital scrapbooking freebie for you!  Some baby wordart from my pages.  They are in png format with a transparent background.  See preview below.  Please leave a comment if you download, I really appreciate it!

Download here

 Hope you like it!

Is it Spring yet?

I don't know about your weather, but here it's like spring is teasing us.  One day it's almost warm and the next it's freezing!  It snowed yesterday!! and it's MAY for crying out loud...
I wanted to do some springtime pages for my kids.
The first one is of my son waiting and wishing for spring to come!  And the second one is my Chloee - called Springtime in Heaven.  I wonder what that's like...

Credits: ScrappinDsigns

Daddy, when I get to heaven can I taste the Milky Way?

Do you know the Buddy Jewell song Help Pour Out the Rain?  The line is "Daddy, when we get to Heaven, can I taste the Milky Way?".  It's on our list of songs for the girls and I've been wanting to do a page for it for a long time.  Then Kristi came out with the PERFECT kit for it, so I made this page.  I really do love it and it makes me wonder what they are doing in heaven :)

Credit: Kristi W Designs
The full lyrics:
The moment was custom-made to order:
I was ridin' with my daughter on our way back from Monroe.
An' like children do, she started playin' twenty questions,
But I never would've guessed one would touch me to my soul.

She said: "Daddy, when we get to Heaven, can I taste the Milky Way?
"Are we goin' there to visit, or are we goin' there to stay?
"Am I gonna see my Grandpa? Can I have a pair of wings?
"An' do you think that God could use another Angel,
"To help pour out the rain?"

Well, I won't lie: I pulled that car right over,
An' I sat there on the shoulder tryin' to dry my misty eyes.
An' I whispered: "Lord, I wanna thank you for my children.
"'Cause your innocence that fills them often takes me by surprise."

Like: "Daddy, when we get to Heaven, can I taste the Milky Way?
"Are we goin' there to visit, or are we goin' there to stay?
"Am I gonna see my Grandpa? Can I have a pair of wings?
"An' do you think that God could use another Angel,
"To help pour out the rain?"

Well, I thought about it later on,
An' a smile came to my face.
An' when I tucked her in to bed,
I got down on my knees an' prayed.

Lord, when I get to Heaven, can I taste the Milky Way?
"I don't wanna come to visit 'cause I'm comin' home to stay.
"An' I can't wait to see my family and meet Jesus face to face.
"An' do you think, Lord, you could use another Angel,
"To help pour out the rain?"

Mmmm, can I help pour out the rain?

You Make Me Smile Pages

Pages for my new fav song by Uncle Cracker called Smile.
Chloee's page says You make me smile and Bree's has part of the lyrics on her page.

Credit: DigiDesignResort

Lyrics of Smile:
You're better then the best
I'm lucky just to linger in your light
Cooler than the flip side of my pillow, that's right
Completely unaware
Nothing can compare to where you send me,
Lets me know that it's ok, yeah it's ok
And the moments where my good times start to fade

You make me smile like the sun
Fall out of bed, sing like bird
Dizzy in my head, spin like a record
Crazy on a Sunday night
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold, buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
Ohh, you make me smile

Even when you're gone
Somehow you come along
Just like a flower poking the sidewalk crack and just like that
You steal away the rain and just like that

You make me smile like the sun
Fall out of bed, sing like bird
Dizzy in my head, spin like a record
Crazy on a Sunday night
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold, buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
Ohh, you make me smile

Don't know how I lived without you
Cuz everytime that I get around you
I see the best of me inside your eyes
You make me smile
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold, buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild

You make me smile like the sun
Fall out of bed, sing like bird
Dizzy in my head, spin like a record
Crazy on a Sunday night
You make me dance like a fool
Forget how to breathe
Shine like gold, buzz like a bee
Just the thought of you can drive me wild
Ohh, you make me smile

Our 11th anniversary, 15 years together

It was our anniversary last week.  We've been married 11 years and together 15.  It's been a rough road at times and I wanted to do some pages this year for it.  Especially since, we spent it at LegoLand with our son - ha ha - not very romantic but fun anyway!  I'm glad we're at least on the same page as usual as far as what's important to us.
I especially like the timeline page.  It documents the important things that have happened to us.  And I love the Love Letter with the word art - kind of retro!

Credits: Haynay and WM2

In Loving Memory Scrapbook Pages

I've been wanting to do a scrapbook page with the lyrics to the song Living for the Night by George Strait.  I love the line out of the song "Everyday's a Lifetime Without You" because it is so true when you lose a child.  Everyday I feel like I'm losing out on a lifetime with them...
So I did the top page first for Bree.  I love the big clock.  It seems that the biggest thing we miss is time with them.
And of course, I wanted to do a page for Chloee too.  On that page, I used the quote from her funeral.  "If tears could build a stairway and heartache make a lane, I'd walk a path to heaven and bring you home again."  More like run though I would say, if I could I would run to bring her back...

Credits: Fanfan rues des Anges

Here are the George Strait Living for the Night song lyrics:

Everyday's a lifetime without you
Hard to get through, since you've gone
So I do the only thing I know how to,
to get by
I'm living for the night

I've drawn all the curtains in this old house
To keep the sun out, off of my face
Friends stop by to check-in 'cause I've checked out
I tell them I'm fine,
I'm just living for the night

Daylight can't hide the tears I cry
the pain that came with your goodbye
The memories that keep me out of sight
Every night I venture out
into those neon arms that hold me tight
I'm living for the night

I'm a whole lot easier to talk to,
when I've had a few and settled down
Whiskey kills the man you've turned me into
And I come alive
I'm living for the night

Daylight can't hide the tears I cry
the pain that came with your goodbye
The memories that keep me out of sight
Every night I venture out
into those neon arms that hold me tight
I'm living for the night
I'm living for the night

Everyday is a lifetime without you

Disney Scrapbooking Pages at Neverland Pool

My whole side of the family went to Disneyland 2 years ago.  It was so much fun!  My parents stayed at the Disneyland Hotel (we're too cheap to stay there!!!! lol) so we'd never been able to use the Neverland Pool before.  We were super excited to swim there and I love these pages of the family there.
The top one I like because it is kind of a flip on what Ariel says - but this time we want to be part of her world.

Credits: Kellybell

Alice in Wonderland Scrapbooking Pages and Disney Digital Scrapbooking Freebie

I just loved the new Alice in Wonderland movie and since then there have been tons of amazing Alice digital scrapbooking kits around.  I was super excited to do some Alice pages and I love how they turned out!
The top one is so precious - you can just see how nervous he is to look at Alice and talk to her!!  So sweet.
The second one is at a door in Disneyland next to the Alice ride and Mad Hatter shop.  I think probably every kid in the history of Disneyland has tried to open that door!  And I hope that he always continues to believe and imagine and try to open the door :)
Credits: Anelia

Here's my freebie for you.  An autograph from Alice that we got at Disneyland.  I extracted it and recolored to black and red.  It says, "Love, Alice".  Hope you can use it.  Thanks for leaving a comment if you download!

Download it here

My Cupcake Sweetie

This photo makes me laugh!!!  We had Chloee's birthday at the cemetery that year and we had LOTS and lots of cupcakes.  He took advantage of that and ate a lot of them - or rather tried to eat a lot of them - really getting it all over himself!  What a cute cupcake sweetie!

Journaling: Did that cupcake for Chloee's birthday speak to you and say "Eat Me!"?! It sure looks like
it did! You got it everywhere! You make me laugh. You are so cute. My Cupcake Sweetie

Credits: Just Jaimee

My Funny, Silly, Adorable Boy

I swear I have the funniest, cutest boy ever!!!!  He is such a hoot.  Everyday is something different - of course a lot of the same too - those little boys love their potty jokes!!!  He's goofy and silly and sweet and loving.  I am so thankful for him and wanted to do some fun pages in between my hard (grieving) ones.  So here's In a Boy's World and MR. Funny Pants!  I worked on these over the drive to LegoLand that we just got back from - we had a great time.  I love them both because they just show how fun he is - creative, imaginative, goofy, silly, happy!
He is such a joy to me!!

Credits: JamieDell Scraps

Diaper Cake Pages

I've been wanting to scrapbook some of the harder things that we (as grieving parents) go through - and it's painful but I'm really happy with how these pages turned out and document just one difficult thing we've done.

Journaling reads:
The Diaper cake for Nurse Carrie

One of the hard things
that a grieving parent has
to do is to decide what to
do with their child's things.
There were many things and many
different decisions we  made about their things.
One thing I kept was Chloee's diapers.  I
expected to use them with our next child but
when Bree was alive she never grew big enough
to use Chloee's diapers. So when Bree died, we
had twice as many diapers that I didn't know
what to do with and that made me soooo sad
that they sat there instead of being used by
my babies. I finally decided to give them to
the very special people in my life that had been
there for us and that had struggled through
life also. One of those people was Nurse Carrie.
She is one of only a few nurses who cared for
and loved both of my girls. Carrie struggled with
cancer and infertility and we could relate to
each other's problems and the crappiness of
life. In 2008, she finally had a baby girl and I
wanted to give her some of their diapers.  I made a
cute little diaper cake to give to her. It felt
good to give them to her to use. She was such a
good friend to me and loved my girls so
much!  We love you Nurse Carrie!

Carrie is currently undergoing cancer treatments
and transplants.  Carrie - just want you to know
we love you and are thinking of you!!

Credits: Delicious Scraps